Rock and roll already comes with plenty of flavor. Some bands are loud. Others are smooth. And others are crunchy, sticky, weird, unforgettable, or completely addictive. So naturally, we asked listeners to take famous rock band names and turn them into candy-inspired creations: candy bands.
The results were sweet, ridiculous, and exactly the kind of thing that makes rock fans fun. A great rock pun needs two things: a band name everybody knows and a candy twist that makes you groan and laugh at the same time. These crowd favorites delivered both. Let’s unwrap the best rock band names turned into candy.
Candy Bands
100 Grand Funk Railroad
Michigan rock fans should appreciate this one. Grand Funk Railroad already gave us one of the greatest American rock anthems with “We’re an American Band.” Add a 100 Grand bar, and suddenly you have 100 Grand Funk Railroad. It is rich, chewy, and proudly Flint-adjacent in spirit.
3 Musketeers For Fears
Tears for Fears meets 3 Musketeers, and the result is wonderfully dramatic. It sounds like a candy bar that has deep thoughts, big 80s synths, and possibly a cape. “Everybody Wants to Rule the World” hits differently when chocolate nougat is involved.
Ted Nougat
Ted Nugent becomes Ted Nougat, which might be the stickiest name on the list. It is short, silly, and painfully obvious in the best possible way. Also, “Cat Scratch Fever” suddenly sounds like something that happened after eating too much Halloween candy.
The Almond Joy Brothers
The Allman Brothers Band gets a tropical candy makeover as The Almond Joy Brothers. There is something oddly perfect about this one. Southern rock, long jams, coconut, almonds, chocolate. It is laid-back, sweet, and just a little nutty.
Jimi HenTwix
Jimi Hendrix as Jimi HenTwix is a masterpiece of candy wordplay. Hendrix gave rock guitar a whole new vocabulary. Twix gave us the eternal left bar versus right bar debate. Together, you get a name that sounds like a psychedelic candy commercial from another dimension.
Bon Bon Jovi
Bon Jovi becomes Bon Bon Jovi, and now “Livin’ on a Prayer” comes with a chocolate center. This one is smooth, sweet, and arena-ready. You can almost hear the crowd chanting it at Pine Knob.
Tom Petty and the Jawbreakers
Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers become Tom Petty and the Jawbreakers, which is one of the best swaps on the list. It keeps the rhythm of the original name while adding just the right amount of candy-shop attitude. Plus, a jawbreaker feels like the kind of candy you take on a long American road trip.
OREO Speedwagon
REO Speedwagon becomes OREO Speedwagon, and this one deserves a standing ovation. It is clean, obvious, and delicious. “Keep On Loving You” now sounds like something you whisper to the last cookie in the package.
Pixies Stix
The Pixies become Pixies Stix, and this might be the most natural fit of the bunch. The Pixies already sound like something mischievous and slightly chaotic. Pixy Stix are basically sugar in a tube. That feels accurate.
The Go-Gogurts
The Go-Go’s become The Go-Gogurts, which may not be candy in the strictest sense, but we are not here to call the snack police. It is fun, nostalgic, and perfect for anyone who grew up with lunchbox snacks and new wave hooks.
M&M
This one is simple and brilliant. Eminem becomes M&M. Yes, it is more hip-hop than rock, but Detroit gets a pass. Also, when a name is sitting right there, wrapped in a candy shell, you have to take it.
Cake
This one is almost cheating, but it counts. Cake was already ready for the assignment. No changes needed. Sometimes the best candy-rock band name is the one that walked in fully frosted.
The Sweet Sound of Rock Puns
The best part of this list is the creativity. The band names and candy go together beautifully, but it took someone to make the connection. I love a good groan-worthy pun. Tying band names to candy to create candy bands? In my opinion, that’s a home run.
Thanks to everyone for their awesome submissions!
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